Saturday, October 29, 2011

Hit That Halloween Party

Just in time for a night men vomiting from too many spider-shaped Jell-O shots and women dressed as everything from slutty Red Riding Hood to slutty Frankenstein...here is the HitThatDive "What the hell am I?" voting card. 

If you're like me, you just throw on a bunch of stuff from a box in the attic and call it  a costume...even though you have no idea what the hell you are.  If you find yourself in this same boat, just print a bunch of these handy dandy cards, and let everyone else vote for what the hell they think you are dressed as this year.  Be safe out there this weekend kids!

 

Thursday, October 27, 2011

Homy Inn, Omaha -- RETORT

Let's revisit a trip to the Homy...shall we?
Yesterday I received a comment regarding my review of Omaha’s Homy Inn. And, according to the writer named “not sure you are cool” I totally, completely and utterly missed the mark in my review of the place. So, for the sake of n.s.y.a.c., I am going to address each of his (or hers…but I’m assuming it’s a dude) comments to clarify aspects of my review that may have not been as clear as I had assumed.

n.s.y.a.c.’s Point Number One: “I guess I don't know who you are trying to target as an audience, but if it's people who love classic bars with great character and lack pretention(SIC), I think you totally missed the mark on your review.”

HitThatDive Says: Who’s the audience? That’s an easy one…it’s spelled out right on the site. “I risk life, limb (and liver) to review all the dives and gin joints you always wanted to stop at but were too afraid to belly up to the bar.” See, the problem is the definition of a “dive” bar. For people that go to a real dive like Sneaky Pete’s in South O, the Homy would be WAY upscale. And for those that like to hang out at a place like Crave in Midtown Crossing, the Homy may be a place they would never have nerve to walk into. Let’s just say I attempt to appeal to a fairly wide audience.

Order single malt scotch = pretentious
And “lack of pretention”? Sorry, but freshly scrubbed gentlemen in fluffy sweaters contemplating which type of scotch to quaff for the evening IS pretentious…not going to budge on that one.

n.s.y.a.c’s Point Number Two: “By this standard, the Homey (SIC) is one of the best - not just in Omaha, but one of best I have ever been to. It is pretty much a neighborhood place, so I think you are off the mark on it being consumed by "suburban hipsters wannabes" whatever that means. I guess I missed the whole hat and scarf thing - never noticed it anyway.”

HitThatDive Says: A picture from SuburbanHipster.com pretty much sums up every person I saw in the Homy the night I was there. How many of these fine young folks looks familiar to you?

n.s.y.a.c’s Point Number Three: “You downplayed the broad selection of beers and full bar, and you blew it on the food part- Sgt Peffers Italian is across the street and delivers quick and hot some the best pizza in town. The only issue there is make sure you have Peffs bring you plates, silverware and napkins.”

Just a "dive bar" kind of guy.
HitThatDive Says: I’ll quote directly from my review for part of this, “I’ll give credit where it’s due, they have cool shit EVERYWHERE and a great beer selection of nearly 30 beers on tap and more than 50 types of bottled beer.” Not sure I call that downplaying anything?

Sgt Peffers Italian is across the street and delivers quick and hot some the best pizza in town," stated n.a.y.a.c. Yes and so does Pappa John’s, Domino’s, Jimmy John’s and just about any Chinese restaurant in the area. Your argument is that the Homy has great food because you can order it from somewhere else? By that rationale, every bar has great food. That was being a bit nitpicky on my part…oh well.

n.s.y.a.c’s Point Number Four: “Also, the jukebox is internet connected which is great and they usually turn it up loud enough to enjoy your selections.”

HitThatDive Says: Internet jukeboxes are the work of pure evil! Why give someone the chance to play 10 songs in a row from High School Musical and therefore kill any sort of cool vibe at all? Places like Brother’s in Omaha or the always AWESOME Double Down in Vegas have jukeboxes that only play music their regulars want to hear…without ever the threat of hearing Barry Manilow!

n.s.y.a.c.’s Point Number Five: "The bar not only has a great collection of nostalgic everything beer and bourbon, for those who love that by gone era, but the displays themselves have been there so long they themselves are authentic nostalgia."

HitThatDive Says: See above where I quote from my review that there is “cool shit EVERYWHERE”. For those that are not regular readers of this site, this is indeed a compliment.

n.s.y.a.c’s Point Number Six: "Finally, it is a great intimate place to watch sports as well. I have been going there for 25 years and the place is basically unchanged."

HitThatDive Says: Awesome.

n.s.y.a.c’s Parting Shot: “Anyway, for those of your audience who prefer the danger of authentic tough guys and attention seeking drunks, this is probably not the bar for them.”

HitThatDive Retorts: I stand by my final thoughts from the original review. “Because a bar is in an old building with stuff all over the wall, does not make it a dive. It is a funky, eclectic, well-run establishment that attracts the type of crowd I like to avoid. But, this just attracts too much of the Ubran Outfitters-type (with matching snooty drink orders) to be a legitimate dive. That said, it is an Omaha institution, that you should visit if only once in your life.”

Still curious about places that I really consider to be classic bars with great character and lack of pretension? Read on n.s.y.a.c…read on. HitThatDive certified classic American dive bars.


This very well may have been from a casting call at the Homy Inn.

Monday, October 24, 2011

Fox and Hound, Omaha (West) -- RANT/REVIEW

Your waitress will be with you...NEVER!
17602 Wright Street
Omaha, NE
(402) 334-3133

Football fans...if you want to sit in a completely empty bar and not be waited on while you watch your favorite teams. Have I got the place for you!!!

Beer and Pittsburgh Steelers football at a "sports" bar, what can go wrong?  Well, actually there is one thing that did go wrong, after nearly an hour of sitting at a table (the only sound for the game was not on in the bar area, or I naturally would have been there) the "waitress" (and I use that term loosely) never even acknowledged that I was sitting in her area...maybe waiting tables ain't your bag, babe. 

Oh sure, she waited on the other four people that were sitting in a room that was big enough to hold at least a 100 people. And, I was even seated at a table directly next to them.  She had to have known I was there because she even bumped into me as she brought them a few drinks, AND she had time to sweep the area around where I was sitting.  The one and only beer I had for 30 minutes of football (a new record low...for me by the way) was the one that I ended up walking to the completely empty bar and getting myself...naturally I gave myself a great tip (plant your corn in May).

There she is not waiting on me!
On my way out the door at halftime, I saw a person that I assumed was a manager.  I let her know, in a nice way (keep in mind that I wasn't even remotely close to a buzz) that after an hour of sitting in her restaurant...I was still waiting for service.  It's at this point where a good manager would have found a way to slide me a $25 gift card...or at least a free beer.  Safe to say I got neither. 

Could I have done something to get her attention, I guess so?  But I have one pretty standard rule...it's not my job to inform you that I want a drink (or food) when I am sitting at a table in your restaurant...that's what you get paid for.  Don't take a job as a waitress if you don't want to wait on people.  Good lord...the word WAIT is even in your job title!  Let's just say I do not recommend this faux-themed English Pub/"sports" bar even if it were the last place on Earth!  OK...now I'm stretching it a bit...but I won't be back either. 


DIVE-O-METER
Not enough to give them a number...so they get the first-ever giant F.U.

Hey Fox and Hound...F.U.!!

Fox and Hound Pub & Grille on Urbanspoon