|Right across from the police|
4917 South 136th Street
Omaha, NE 68137
I’m three-for-three on wandering into great bars in Millard, so I was willing to put my streak on the line and spend an afternoon in the One-N-Go Saloon. It’s about as nondescript as a bar can get from the outside, but according the signs in the front windows they do have free Wi-Fi and goldfish races on Saturday nights. What do the two have in common? I have no friggin’ idea…let’s go and find out!
Pros: Great regulars…good happy hour prices…goldfish races
Cons: Directly across the street from a police station.
First Impressions: I didn’t get two steps in the door and the entire bar turned around to give me the now standard “who the hell are you” look. It’s a pretty barebones looking bar, and all the windows are shaded-out like an adult book store (well so I’m told that’s what an adult bookstore looks like on the inside). A bumper sticker on one of the glass coolers states “Your Mission: hang with drunks” let’s me know this is my kind of place.
|Looks like a bar to me|
The Bar: Nothing fancy, but seemingly well-stocked for a shot and beer kind of crowd. The bar itself had standard issue beers on tap, tons of UV vodka chilling in the glass-front coolers and plenty of buckets for beer. It seems that the preferred method of ordering a beer here is to get 6 at a time in a bucket…I have no problems with that. The rest of the place is big, like really big. There’s at least 20 tables or so and even an area that can accommodate private parties.
The Crowd: Out of about 10 people, I was clearly the only non-regular throwing back a few drinks. But, that didn’t seem to stop people from introducing themselves, offering me cookies, buying me shots and generally making the new guy feel like a regular in less time then it took me to get halfway through my first beer. Looking for a good indicator of how well a bar is run…gauge it by the people who spend a lot of their free time there. From what I saw from the regulars in the first 10 minutes I was there, this is indeed my kind of bar. Oh, and man, the regulars loves them some Keno in this place.
Service: I never did get the dudes name, but he was a younger jovial bartender. I think I overheard him say that he only worked there on Saturdays, but even if he’s only a part-timer, he was fast with the refills and seemed to have a good sense of humor. Again, it’s bars like this that easily could make an outsider feel like quickly downing a beer and getting the hell out. Friendly service on the other hand, is one of the biggest reasons people come back to a bar (or get a good review from HitThatDive).
Price: Miller Lite draws were setting me back $2.00...I think? See the problem was that I was having such a great time once I sat down I took some pretty shitty notes…even by my standards. I can tell you this much…happy hour is from 4-6 and gets you $2.50 bottles, $2.25 pints, $1.50 draws and $13 buckets. I even saw a sign for a “shot bucket” that has a combination of beers with a few chilled shots thrown in for $19.50. I want to say I paid $5ish for a shot…but don’t quote me on that one.
|Freaked me out a bit|
Food: There was a box of cookies on the bar, and I did see a sign that said they are now serving pizza as well. If you’re really hungry just stagger across the street to the police station and quiz Johnny Law where he stops for donuts and then get in your car. I assure you nothing bad could ever come from doing that.
Entertainment: A few TVs, a pool table, dart board, golden tee and a long shuffleboard table all the way in back by the goldfish races. Oh, did I mention those yet? On Saturday nights, and keep in mind words can’t do this justice, people squirt goldfish with a Supersoaker down what looks like a long gutter to see which fish crosses the finish line first. I’m not sure how else to put it…it’s worth an hour of your time on a Saturday night. Trust me.
Restrooms: Fine enough I suppose. Nothing to complain about, and the mens room even had one of those old-school towel machines where the towel is in one continuous loop. Even as I kid, I never understood why those things were considered a good idea. They seem to look like the opposite of clean. For the record I just dried my hands on my pants instead.
|Dry your hands on your pants|
Bartender Chat: We chatted about anything and everything. But, my favorite moment was when some rather looking preppy guy walked into the (and I got to give HIM the “who the hell are you look”), stood there for about a minute watching the TV and then turned and walked out. Just as the young douche was opening the door to leave, my bartender for the afternoon yells as loud as he can “THANK YOU FOR COMING IN!”
How Far Did My $20 Go: FAR. Like I said, I think I way paying $2 a beer. But, because the people in this place are the outgoing/hardworking/friendly types…I had several shots sent my way. I even tried to buy a couple sitting to my left a shot, but because they were winning at Keno, would not let me buy them one…even though they sent a few my way. But, according to my math, $20 at happy hour will get you 13 draws...that's pretty damn good.
Final Impressions: As a group of us were sitting at the bar having a marathon sing-along session to Def Leppard tunes on the super loud jukebox, I realized that yet again Millard did not disappoint. If you like bars where you can sit, have fun, talk to everyone around you and walk out with a good low-cost buzz…this is YOUR kind of bar. Just be careful that you don’t stagger across the street and mistake a patrol car for your own ride. But if you actually do that, please have enough wits about you to take a picture before you’re arrested and send it to HitThatDive@gmail.com. HIT THIS DIVE!
|Hit This Dive!|